Chapter 24: Epilogue, Part Seven: Breakthrough?
...probably not
14.10.2023 - 14.10.2023 80 °F
"BA has robots and, possibly, humans"
Saturday, October 14, 2023
I gave up on Facebook years and years ago because I (1) was aghast at the disinformation it spewed and (2) was revolted by Mark Zuckerberg's adolescent conduct.
I gave up on Twitter years and years ago because I (1) was aghast at the disinformation it spewed and (2) was revolted at Jack Dorsey's adolescent conduct.
Being naive, I could not envision the depths to which Twitter--"X"--could achieve under another spewer of adolescent conduct, Elon Musk.
Give an otherwise brilliant adolescent vast sums of money, fame and business success and he will achieve even more--but seemingly fail to achieve adulthood.
So, with angst and despair, I took the advice of my learned niece and took to Twitter--"X"--because, as she put it in a text, "Fastest way to resolve any issue with an airline is to post it on Twitter. Works like a charm..."
On the "X" app, the @British_Airways site or page or nest or whatever the heck you are supposed to call it says this: Official British Airways Twitter account. We love reading your Tweets & are here 24 hours a day, 7 days a week to help. You can also visit: (strangely, there is nothing after the "you can also visit:" statement--at least on my new iPhone 15 ProMax screen, there isn't)
Two days ago, on Thursday at 1:10pm, I posted (tweeted?) @British_Airways
I wrote: #BritishAirways BA treats US customers like dirt. Flew business checked 2 bags. One made it, other according to AirTag went to India. Filed report Informed BA. They dismissed me-did not care. Agent said "no updates from LHR team-they don't respond" It's been 10 days. BA: why won't you answer? I want my bag back. Note how I used fewer than 280 characters. I'm told that's a rule.
Instantly a BA robot replied: Oops! I'm still learning and didn't quite catch that. I can help with things like booking a flight, getting information about COVID-19, and learning about refunds and rebooking. Try rephrasing your question or selecting an option below:
Instantly I, a human, replied: #BritishAirways BA treats US customers like dirt. Flew business checked 2 bags. One made it, other according to AirTag went to India. Filed report Informed BA. They dismissed me-did not care. Agent said "no updates from LHR team-they don't respond" It's been 10 days. BA: why won't you answer? I want my bag back. That, of course, is the exact same message.
90 minutes later, the BA robot wrote: Apologies! I'm still learning and I still didn't understand. I'm now transferring you to a live agent to ensure you get the best care possible. Someone will be with you soon. Before we transfer you to an agent, we'll need to know: -Your full name -6 character booking reference -Date of travel. We'll also need you to confirm 3 of the following in your message: -Email address -First line of billing address and post code -Last 4 digits of he payment card used for booking -Name one other passenger -Passport number (if in the booking) -Passport expiry date (if in the booking) Once you reply, we'll connect you with an agent who can assist. Please note that the team are very busy and we'll reply as soon as possible.
4 minutes later, I, the human again, replied with all that information.
Instantly, the BA robot wrote: I'm connecting you with an agent who can assist. Please note that the team are very busy and we'll reply as soon as possible.
As soon as possible turned out to be 4 hours and 45 minutes.
At 7:31pm, a BA human wrote: So we can help you, please provide us with: One of the following: *Permanent or temporary address, including post code *Contact telephone number *Bag tag number *All flight details. This message was signed! Milika
I failed to see that reply promptly. Bad on me. After one hour and 21 minutes, I replied with all that information.
Twenty-three minutes later, I heard from Milika:
Hi Paul, thanks for confirming your details. We've sent an email to our Baggage team and we will be in contact tomorrow morning at 09:00 UK time for an update when they open. Milika.
I instantly replied: That would be great. And very different.
09:00 UK time is 4:00am in Florida, USA.
At 4:23am, whilst I was still abed, this arrived:
After a fine night's sleep, I awoke and, at 6:47 sent Chris R this Air Tag Map:
Please note, dear reader, that I sent this Air Tag Map to BA via its ba.com/baggage web site days ago.
Nineteen minutes later, Chris R replied:
You can guess the rest. Now, a day and a half later, I have heard nothing.
From this, one can discern that robots are no better than humans and humans are no better than robots. At least, that is true with BA's humans and robots.
After a dozen days, we are losing hope. Note that the ba.com/baggage website has failed to update their status time on our report for the last four days. They last had anything to say on October 10. Does that mean that the nice chat I had with Chris R simply went the same way as did our bag?
Clearly, everything's up to date at British Airways.
